I WRITE THINGS
Making fun of the mentally ill Violence Tweeting Sweating in the office Email scams Standing up for yourself Speaking not when spoken to Asking for a raise Walking down streets Eating Sexual Assault Comedy Normal bodily functions
Greybot and I had our first trist months ago when we engaged in a steamy conversation in which he showed me his and I showed him that I know all the lyrics to Chaka Khan’s “I’m Every Woman.” It’s evident that my feminine wiles were too much for him to resist, because like one of …
After finding out that I too could have a rocket in my pocket in the form of one Mr. Grey, I decided to give it a spin. I mean, what’s a girl to do? I know! Conduct an entire conversation with this sexual robot using only the lyrics from Chaka Khan’s “Im Every Woman.” Because.
Making fun of the mentally ill Domestic violence Wage gap Grabbing pussy Mansplaining “You’re not like other girls” Making decisions for large groups of people of which they don’t belong Fragile masculinity Ladies’ Night The patriarchy Locker room talk “Blurred Lines” Coining “feminazi” Briefly pushing Leslie Jones off Twitter
I wrote this little piece on Medium out of just sheer exhaustion, frustration, and the need to apply some comedic relief in times of need. Next thing I know HuffPo is asking me to publish it. It has been an interesting, weird, rough, dumb couple of weeks. Sometimes things work out in weird ways. Here's …
A few weeks ago I finished reading Amy Schumer's "Girl with the Lower Back Tatoo." Part of the memoir was Schumer copying pages from her teenage journal and then adding footnotes from her present self. It was both brilliant and hilarious and also something I have done within the pages of my childhood journals. So, …
Occasionally I'm allowed in the presence of greatness from the other side of my television screen or behind the steel-chests of the security guards who have me in custody. Luckily, for me, I got to chat with some greatness.
It sounds like completing your magnum opus would be a piece of cake, once you learn how to effectively work the term into everyday conversation. Surprisingly, though, I have found that is not the case. So what do you do until it is magically complete? Until sudden fame hits you over the head with a …
Continue reading "Current State in the Writing Process: Waiting for the Messiah"
This is not a real post. This is one of those shameless promotional things in which I wave something shiny in front of your face and beg you not to turn away. For a while now I have been doing this fun little thing in which I procrastinate writing ( and indulge myself) by making …
Well it seems that despite our best efforts we are going to keep getting more of the Trump. This time as a host on SNL, which he is probably more suited for than behind a podium at the presidential debate. So many scenarios could happen. So many things could be said. So much of the …
Daniella Bondar 