All The Times I’ve Handed Out My Business Card

This may sound like a ridiculous task: the cataloging of all the passerby I have courageously handed my card to and said “be in touch.” In truth, it’s not. People terrify me.

1. My Mother 

If I were to judge the stake in the corporation that is me, she would have the highest based on her collection of my baroque patterned cards.  She was the first one to  have any and carries them around in a green wallet she calls “Daniella Wallet.” It contains nothing but my business card and extra checks with my name on them in case I can’t get to a bank. So thanks, love you too mom.

2. The Argentine

Somewhere there’s a 42-year-old Argentine gentleman walking around with my business card in his pocket.  I wish I could say he was a business contact, but alas, no.  There’s  a place I frequent where the beers are cheap and the decor is trailer park strip club chic.  On one breezy night a few years ago I decided, under the influence of one gin and tonic too many, to head over to my spot alone in the night.  Although this particular establishment is near and dear to my heart I know better than to go alone. But I did. I ended up sitting at the bar and while a bustier-clad bartender served me drinks an older gentleman tried to pay for them.

The Argentine was soaking his troubles in a seven-dollar pitcher of Bud Light. He made passes at the bartenders he had come to know, apparently the far corner of the bar was a second home to him. After sometime, I somehow ended up rewriting his OkCupid profile on a beer-stained napkin. That’s when he asked for my number.  And the alcohol decided for me that it was safer to hand him a business card with only my number on it but every other possible way to contact me.  As you have probably already guessed it wasn’t the best of ideas and I had to stop going to my spot so often.  On the plus side he had thick hair, an accent, and is younger than my father.

3. The Filmmaker 

This is the closest my business card ever got to the hands of a business-like contact. He worked in a cafe/ coffee shop/ wine bar I liked to write in.  The more I went the more we got to talking. The filmmaker was working on sets and scripts and at the time I was working on manuscripts and teaching people what the Twitter machine does. He asked if I wouldn’t mind helping him learn about the ways of the Twitter machines too. So I spent the next few visits at the cafe indulging him the world of handles and hashtags. I, however, immediately regretted giving him the business card when he asked to meet me outside his place of work.  First it meant that I would have to meet him outside his place of work and secondly that place would be somewhere I had never been before, which caused much panic.   Of course I had no choice but to go, if not only for the fact that I planned on going back to the cafe and if I didn’t things would be pretty awkward.  I walked in and he was already there, even though I got there early so I could learn the lay of the land before he arrived and noticed my uncomfortable twitching.

The coffee only came in dirt-tasting and the only sugar-subsitute was coconut sugar which didn’t seem like something that actually existed. I sweated through the fibers of my half-priced Urban Outfitters tank and pretended to know things. We talk occasionally.

4. Three NaNoWrimo Participants 

For those of you who are unfamiliar with NaNo, it stands for National Novel Writers Month. It takes place every November. The goal is to write  50k in a month. Well, I am not a novel writer, and doing it once taught me that I never want to do it again. It was more a way for me to meet people with shared interest than to write a shitty 50k. I met a lot of people, most of whom cared a lot about  dragons and fairies and dragon sex and weird porn I’m sure. But I did meet a few folks who didn’t scare me and seemed rather pleasant and so in an attempt to seem acclimated and network I handed some cards out.

5. Friends 

Not just any friends.  Friends who I liked. Of course friends already know how to reach me,however, enchanted by the patterns on the back of the cards and the way they said ” Writer, Blogger, Pen & Paper Enthusiast” I felt the need to share them with those closest to me.  I made sure both of them got one.

6. Exes 

By exes I mean one ex. And of course I gave it to him for the same reason I gave it to my friends… the only difference was I gave him two. I wanted him to share them and also I think it was a matter of happenstance, he was here when they got delivered and how rude would it be if I kept them from him?

7. The Boyfriend

This transaction took place before the title relationship, I believe. And the reasoning behind it is still not totally clear to me. I believe I thought it was something people in Grad School do when they meet each other? Or maybe I just wanted him to have it. He keeps it in his wallet, I applaud him for that, it seems to add some girlish charm to the whole thing.

One Reply to “All The Times I’ve Handed Out My Business Card”

  1. This is awesome. When I started my job, we were able to get a box of 500 business cards. I’ve handed out 3 so far. In a couple years when I get that number up to 7, I’ll write a similar post.



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